Woman to Woman: Keys to Making a Difference

By Marsha D. Link, PhD, Link Consulting

Now that the AAO is behind us, hopefully each has found time to catch her breath. As the holidays approach, perhaps many of us are beginning to take inventory of what we have done and what we yet have to do before 2011 exits.

This month’s column will focus on making a difference, whether we are thinking about our accomplishments in this year or the goals and challenges ahead in 2012.

Successful leaders of both genders often cite “making a difference” as a key motivator and reward in the work they do. They are interested in having their efforts result in positive, constructive outcomes, as opposed to working only to seek recognition and further their power as a result of their title or position. Most of us want our efforts to be rewarded, but one of the most gratifying effects of our labors is to experience internally the sense that what we have done has impact and truly makes a difference.

Consider these three factors that help to create the ability to make a difference: Competence, Confidence, and Courage. Let’s explore each factor separately.

Competence

In order for us to have impact, we must develop competencies that have value to an organization. Sometimes it is not easy to determine all the competencies that are required in a particular position. Job descriptions often describe the skills needed for a particular position, but often there are other competencies that are not explicitly stated.

Sometimes we become aware of these only after we are working in the organization and become familiar with the culture and the specific context of the work environment. In order to ensure that you can make a difference through using your unique set of competencies, consider the following questions:

1. Do I have the knowledge, skills, and subject matter expertise to make a difference? If not, what do I need to do to develop these?

2. What actions do I take to indicate that I want to make a difference? It is important to communicate to others your intentions.

3. How do I share my unique competencies to make a difference? Being appropriately assertive to behave in ways that others see your unique gifts requires being intentional and thoughtful in your interactions with others.

Confidence

Confidence is a trait that women sometimes have difficulty developing and/or expressing. Perhaps it is related, in part, to our socialization, or the attitudes we have learned from parents or other significant persons in our lives who have reminded us to be humble and avoid egotistical behaviors.

However, when we feel secure about our competencies and can reinforce ourselves internally about who we are and what we contribute, our ability to behave confidently increases.

Reflect on your own degree of confidence by asking:

1. What specific behaviors do I observe in persons I admire and respect that show high degrees of confidence? How do these people use their confidence to make a difference?

2. What is my own definition of confidence? What do I do that shows others that I have a realistic view of myself, neither diminishing nor over-inflating myself, so that I can make a difference?

3. How can I increase my confidence? Who are those in my network that I trust who can give me advice on confidence building so I can make a difference?

Courage

Each of us has had experiences in life that have demanded different degrees of courage. Sometimes in the workplace, we forget that we need to use courage, whether it is in daring to offer a new idea that may or may not be well-received, approaching conflict that needs resolution when no one else is likely to do so, or perhaps asking for an opportunity to take on a new and/or bigger project when no one else seems to think of you as a candidate.

We do ourselves a disservice when we fail to exercise our courage; one reason is that fears, real or imagined, immobilize us. Once we confront these fears and have an experience in which we successfully overcome them, our courage increases.

Susan Jeffers, in her book “Feel the Fear And Do it Anyway,” challenges us to identify our fears, move from victim to creator, and “outtalk the negative chatterbox in our brain.”

Ideas to contemplate relative to courage are:

1. What are my fears? How do these fears keep me from making a difference?

2. What keeps me from using my competencies and confidence to give me courage to act so that I know I am making a difference?

3. What can I do to “stretch” myself to increase my courage so I can motivate myself and others to make a difference?

Anne Morrow Lindbergh, the noted writer and aviation pioneer, certainly faced many tragedies, as well as successes, in her life. However, she never lost sight of what was important in keeping her competencies, confidence, and courage alive.

Her wisdom is revealed in her request: “Don’t wish me happiness. I don’t expect to be happy. It’s gotten beyond that somehow. Wish me courage and strength and a sense of humor - I will need them all.”

May each of you find your individualized set of keys so you can make a difference and find ways of developing your competencies, confidence, and courage to bring you happiness and success in your personal and professional life.

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November 2011 eNews